Museo River Plate [River Plate Museum]

It’s hard to explain football culture to people who weren’t raised in places so deeply entrenched in it.  I certainly don’t understand it fully myself.  So, before I jump in here, allow me to create a bit of context.

Club Atlético River Plate and Club Atlético Boca Juniors are the biggest teams in Argentina, with a long and storied rivalry.  For utterly bananas reasons you can read about here, the 2018 Copa Libertadores Final’s second leg between River and Boca was played not in Buenos Aires, but Spain.  River won that game and the Cup, and this was a restaurant I happened to be near at the time (I live in the area of the River stadium).

So.  River Plate and Boca Juniors are kind of a big deal.

The athletic clubs are entire ecosystems, with different sports and teams and members and fans–but the team that is synonymous with the club name is the senior men’s football team.  The stadium museums are focused on them.  Which leads me to:

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The Museo River Plate is at the stadium, which has one large, non-sports-related claim on my interest:  Estadio Monumental is a major setting in The Eternaut, a famous Argentine sci-fi comic.

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As seen in a mural near The Monumental.

But on to the museum.  It begins with a futuristic look back at the team’s past.

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Those black tunnel-looking rooms to the sides give the team’s history and its wider context in that particular decade, and, given the dearth of artifacts, it does a creditable job of giving a physical sense to long history.

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Each of the tunnel rooms has some information about the teams of the time, and also a diorama that shows a notable non-soccer scene of the era.  For instance, for the 40s, you have the above team stuff, and also a balcony set for a Perón speech.

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Glare, glare, everywhere.

The stadium was also the site of Argentina’s win of the 1978 World Cup (the national team still plays its home games here).

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The 70s diorama is a newsstand (also haven’t really changed), and it includes a nod to “The Eternaut” (on the right, above the Vogue), which feels a bit poignant, as the author was disappeared and murdered by the military dictatorship in power at that time.

Eventually, the tunnel ends and you’re deposited among several years’ worth of team hardware.

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And this rather unique gift to the club from the national football association commemorating the club’s 100th birthday.

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…’kay.

There were a few other interesting things in that room, but with all the lights and glass, the photos rather prominently feature the back of my phone and hands, alas.

Famous players have their area, of course.

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I do not know a single one of them, which lessens the impact somewhat but the other visitors were pretty stoked.

Some of these pillars have QR codes that are supposed to show the player’s best goals, but I tried to download the app it required and watch them and could never make it work, which was a bit disappointing.

There’s some stadium history!  The current location dates back to the 30s.  There’s a pretty neat little model of the old gates and seating.

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And the current look:

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Textile nerds gonna textile nerd, so here’s an old jersey.  I bet that’s blood on it.

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It’s a two-storey building, which accommodates a theater and an overhead view of the entrance, where the current team hardware is available for photo ops.

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There’s also this, which must mean something but hell if I know what.

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Now, Mr Exhibitist is a lifelong fan of a different football club, so I am forbidden by the articles of marriage from patronizing the museum swag shop.  But dear lord, the merch.

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The variety rivals that of Hello Kitty.

It’s an interesting visit for those into sport, and stadium tours are also available on the hour.  For what it’s worth, every local football team I’ve googled has their own museum, although I imagine the River and Boca ones are probably the biggest and best funded.

Museo River Plate is at Figueroa Alcorta 7509, part of the stadium complex (the stadium’s official name is Estadio Antonio Vespucio Liberti, but it’s only ever called The Monumental).  It’s open every day from 10am to 7pm, although I would guess not on game days.  I would not advise being anywhere near the stadium on game days, in any case.  The entry fee for the museum alone is 340 pesos, although I believe that’s the price for Argentines and local residents–foreigners pay a bit more.  The guided stadium tour is extra.

Museo de Armas de la Nación [Weapons Museum of the Nation]

Across from the Plaza de General San Martín, which is a lovely, large plaza near the Retiro train station, in quite a stately building, is the Museo de Armas, originally founded in 1904.

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Right there, below the official oval.

I’m not particularly interested in all the tools humans use to disassemble each other, but swords are neat, so I went to check it out.

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Pretty stately on the inside, too.

The first displays are of medieval armor and weaponry, both replicas and originals.  There was also some disconcertingly incongruous pop music playing in those rooms.

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Replicas of a war hammer and a flail, my favorite medieval weapons.
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Lobster tail helmet from Great Britain, 1600s.

A great variety of pointy things is available for examination, though without much of anything in the way of information–just the sort of label you see above.

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Fancy shmancy French saber.
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Spanish-made saber for the Argentine Army.

Firearms were of course already a thing by the time these swords were made, but the museum also has some artifacts from those more transitional times, when one might still find a rifle’s effectiveness reduced to that of a spear.

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Bayonets have always creeped me out; something about the desperation that must attend having to use one.

Artistry wasn’t limited to swords in the 1800s; this is a hunting rifle that belonged to President Victorino de la Plaza.

Prettier and less bayonet-y, for sure.

But you know what is even cooler than fancy sabers with official ovals and detailed German hunting rifles?  Bonkers cane weapons.

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Debonair, dashing, DANGEROUS

Cane swords AND cane pistols.  Wonder if there’s a safety on that thing.

Of course, there’s plenty of more modern kill stuff.

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*yawn*

But there’s also a few box sets of dueling pistols–including this one, which says it was used in the duel between Pantaleón Gómez and Lucio Victorio Mansilla on Feb. 7, 1880.  Both men were former soldiers, politicians, and journalists, but Gómez ended up the dead one in a story that the Wikipedia entry made sound kind of insane.  Dudes gonna dude, I guess.

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I can’t even.

As weaponry is always pretty closely tied to the military, the museum also has several minifigs that illustrate the history of the uniforms.

The items on display aren’t limited to melee combat and small caliber things, of course.

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Both of these are mid-19th century, the bottom one being a Gatling design, Gatling having been a medical doctor who rather blew off that whole Hippocratic Oath thing. 

Remember what an absolute, unique horror show World War I was, with its meeting of traditional cavalry and horse-drawn supply wagons and mechanized death and chemical warfare?

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Imagine putting a gas mask on a horse, or, hell, being a horse that had to wear a gas mask.

Look, an anti-tank mine.  It’s smaller than my backpack.

 

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That circle to its left is the size of my palm and designed to blow up a human being.

There’s also a room that’s full of weapons from all over Asia, which at least can restore the more comfortable feeling of looking at museum pieces with some artistry to them instead of just efficient kill boxes used within living memory.

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14th century Indonesian.

 

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*sigh* stupid glass cases
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Small utility knife. Nazis ruin everything

So there you have it!  Certainly a very interesting collection of early firearms, fancy swords and Argentine military history.  Not much on the informational side of things, but certainly more interesting than I thought it would be for me.  The Museo de Armas de la Nación is located in Retiro at Santa Fe 702, right across from the Plaza, and very near other sights, like the Kavanagh building and the Basílica Santísimo Sacramento.  It’s easy to get to from the C and E subway lines and Retiro train station.  As of this post, the entry fee is 100 pesos (about US$2).

Tinytour: Archivo General de la Nación: Huellas de Mujeres Trabajadoras

Popped into the National Archive for the small, temporary exhibit on women workers!  Not super sure on the best translation.  Let’s go with “Impressions of Working Women.”

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That guy’s got nothing to do with anything; it’s just the best photo I got of the door.

There’s an exhibit room just inside the Archive, where visitors don’t have to go through security.  It’s pretty small, but a nice place for a curated show of documents.

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Including not happy documents, like this 1942 petition to a charity for assistance from a nurse who contracted tuberculosis in the course of her work.

Plenty of great old photos, which, of course.  It’s the Archive.

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From the School of Nursing affiliated with the Eva Perón Social Help Foundation in 1947.

Actually, though, know what was most impressive?  The freaking exhibit room.

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That’s all for this minipost!  If you’re in Microcentro taking in the government-affiliated tourist sights, you’ll be close to the Archivo General de la Nación.  Pop in for a few minutes to see whatever historic documents they have out for eyeballing and the amazing exhibit room at 25 de mayo 263, weekdays from 10 to 5.